There Ain’t Half Been Some Clever Bastards, by Mike Gold

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There Ain’t Half Been Some Clever Bastards, by Mike Gold - Brainiac On Banjo #98

Posted by Mike Gold at 22nd December, 2008

Einstein can’t be classed as witless.
He claimed atoms were the littlest.
When you did a bit of splitting-em-ness
Frighten everybody shitless
There ain’t half been some clever bastards.
Probably got help from their mum
(who had help from her mum)
There ain’t half been some clever bastards.
Now that we’ve had some,
let’s hope that there’s lots much more to come.
– There Ain’t Half Been Some Clever Bastards,
Ian Dury And The Blockheads

This world is propelled by the energy of the clever. Not necessarily the smart, but most certainly the clever. Clever people need not be Einstein-smart, and to my experience a whole lot of Einstein-smart people are not clever.

We need originality in everything we do. That’s how our society grows; that’s where the new stuff comes from. Stagnation is the enemy: it’s corrosive. Complacency is the enemy: it breeds stagnation. We need more clever ideas. Originality comes from clever people. We need more clever people.

They’re out there, but a lot of them are invisible – even to themselves. It takes a certain amount of courage to show your cleverness. You don’t want to be perceived as an outsider, and you don’t want to be thought of as weird. You most certainly do not want to be wrong: we do horrible things to people who are wrong.

Most of all, you don’t want to fail.

If I had but one piece of advice for 2009, it would be this: Dare to be wrong. Dare to fail. Dare to try and try again. Shake up the system, shake up the planet. Take a chance. Do something different.

We need clever people now more than ever. We need somebody to look at a battery and intuit how it can move a car, a truck, and an airplane. We need somebody to look at the all the never-ending religious and tribal wars (I’m no longer certain there’s a difference) and see a way to help people get past their decrepit hostilities. We need somebody who can figure out how to preserve the vital but dying aspects of our culture: daily newspapers, moribund music, television drama, “comic” books. All have run aground.

We need someone who can offer up a substitute for greed. When the economy tanked, former Fed chairman Alan Greenspan, a smart man who is not clever, said he thought he was managing our financial course correctly but he hadn’t taken into consideration the overwhelmingly obvious: we are, by our very nature, greedy. Rich people want more wealth, but poor people who become wealthy want more as well. Me, I can eat more barbecue brisket than you can put on my plate, but even I figured out I have to establish limits, and I’m working on that. Some clever person has to figure out how to wean us off of our natural greed. It’s killing us.

Barack Obama is smart – and he’s smart enough to put a whole lot of smart people in his inner circle, no matter how that may challenge his authority. I just hope Barack Obama is clever.

—
Next week: New Year’s Revolutions. Please feel free to stimulate my throbbing brainpan by offering your suggestions in our comments section.

Category : Brainiac On Banjo

Comments

Marc Fishman December 22, 2008

Well Mike, good food for thought. I thought “Unshaven Comics” was clever this year by daring to make an educational comic book about a non-fictional event. Were we successful? To a handful of people, I’d like to say yes, we were. But were we clever enough to get our book in Barack’s hands when he was spouting “Si Se Puede!” Like he invented it, when our book was BORN on it’s principles? Well, I guess we’re not THAT clever… and my Aunt knows someone who knows someone who taught Obama’s older daughter. Had we thought to present at that school, Maybe Barack could have been reading “the March” to his daughters as they drifted to sleep.

This year, I feel that the new year revolution will be in the small time indie creators. Hopefully pushed into a little better limelight by Robert Kirkman’s antics, and fueled by internet communities where clever people seek better fiction from those who deserve a chance versus a known name who is limping on his 4th chance (I’m looking at you Judd)… MAYBE this will become a revolution of independent spirit? Eh?

Happy Chanukkah!

Rachel Kadushin December 22, 2008

“It takes a certain amount of courage to show your cleverness. You don’t want to be perceived as an outsider, and you don’t want to be thought of as weird.”

I agree, if you are self-aware enough to know if you’ve ever been perceived as an outsider or weird, then you’ve been there already. So, you’re still here, right? (And when I say “you,” I mean “me” from personal experience… )

Dare to be clever.

… and you know what… its okay if you think I’m weird some of the tiime.

Mike Gold December 22, 2008

“… and you know what… its okay if you think I’m weird some of the time”

Damn straight! Proud to be weird!

R. Maheras December 22, 2008

Well, over the years, I’ve been told I’m clever and smart, and creativity-wise, I’ve always worked hard to be original — or at least inject a twist to something established. I also have a number of untapped ideas.

Yet, in the 40 years I’ve been writing, drawing and inking comics, I’ve made about $500 or so.

As the child who did not have much when I was young, and who was strongly influenced by Depression-era parents, my main goal as an adult has been to work steady, pay the bills, and put food on the table. Obviously, since I have yet to make as much money in 40 years of creating comics as I did in less than two years as a paper boy circa 1970, there’s no way I can justify attempting to tap my full potential as a comics creator.

I don’t mind taking risks, but I usually only take calculated risks. Risking everything to make better comics (or whatever) just isn’t worth the gamble to me. In Maslow’s Hierachy of Needs, physiological and safety trumps self-actualization every time.

Marc Fishman December 22, 2008

I will re-concur with both Mike and Rachel. I’ve dared to be as openly weird as I can for as long as I can remember. Why? Because, I never found a case where my weirdness did anything BUT break the ice or start a great conversation.

Martha Thomases December 22, 2008

It is impossible to be the weirdest person in New York. That’s a great part of its charm.

M.O.T.U December 22, 2008

@ R.

“Yet, in the 40 years I’ve been writing, drawing and inking comics, I’ve made about $500 or so.

$500? Hmmmmm, Really? Well perhaps I can help you make a little more my friend..how well can you draw Asian women?

M.O.T.U December 22, 2008

@ Mike,

What the FISH is up with the bloody head art? I’m not clever enough to see the fit.

Rachel Kadushin December 22, 2008

Marc - You’re lucky. I’ve been slammed, left out, and humiliated… but not mainly from my own doing. What I’m sayin’ is… survive that… and you’ve (I’ve) already experienced just about the worst that can happen. The next step is to try for the best, of course!

Martha, don’t worry… no chances for a competative “weird-off” with me.
Solidarity is more like it.

; )

Mike Gold December 23, 2008

MOTU — That’s the late, great Ian Dury, whose work I quoted at the top of the column and whose song title I stole for this column.

He was one of the greats.

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